The Gayest Two Days Ever.
Seriously though. The past two days have been so gay I hardly know what to do with myself short of carrying around a glitter cannon to shoot at the
muggles hetero’s of the world.
Yesterday was #BornThisDay because it was was Mother Monster’s birthday. Although the birthday celebration didn’t effect my life directly, Lady GaGa tweeted about having chicken and waffles in bed. And anyone who has chicken and waffles in bed is officially a black woman, and therefore DOES personally effect my life. Why? I don’t know. But I promise I’m not being racist.
Lady Gaga tweeted this pitcha via twitter. Redundant? Probably. Necessary? Definitely. She was at her birthday dinner.
Sometimes I hope I am never famous because then I’ll feel obligated to always eat in restaurants that are poorly lit. Does being famous mean you’re also a vampire? I don’t understand the correlation.
I still want to be famous. So bring on the blood and money. But not any blood money please. That’s a very important “and.”
Today is the day
it’s Britney bitch Spears released her new album, Femme Fatale.
In unrelated news, today Kevin Federline also dropped something. His girlfriend Victoria Prince (I don’t have a clue either) is pregnant. Someone tricked him into thinking that this news would detract from her album release.
BB, you’re always going to be her background dancer. It doesn’t matter if you’re literally on stage, or on the stage of LIFE. So please, stop reproducing.
Also, here is my proverbial glitter cannon. I’m about to fire it right in your face. Shield your muggles.
So you need to deal with this (again).
SO NOT straight.
Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,