Fabulosity, with an edge.

WTF File

Lindsay say it ain’t so!

Lindsay Lohan went bar hopping last night with her friend Samantha Swetra. Not only did Linz put herself in a situation that is NOT good for someone working on their sobriety, but Samantha Swetra got into a fight with Paz de la Huerta. They went to Rose Bar at the Gramercie Hotel, and then The Cabin Down Below in the East Village.

Lindsay, you’re looking so much healthier!

 

But it wasn’t too long ago that you looked like this!

 

Don’t mess it up!

Also. Kamofie and Company (the jeweler who is cashing in on Lindsay’s demise) has pulled ANOTHER stunt to exploit this entire situation surrounding Lindsay’s alleged necklace heist. They started a website dedicated to showing people the surveillance video of Lindsay “stealing” the necklace. But you have to pay 2.99 EVERY time you log on. So. Disgusting. Not only have they already tried to get someone to buy the fucking movie rights for this whole fiasco, but now they’re pulling this. I have been saying this was nothing but a publicity stunt since the very beginning! I was right. Lindsay better be acquitted.

 

Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,

Zach

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JBiebs does it all.

Justin Bieber has hit every single aspect of the entertainment industry thus far, and he is extending the reach of his pubescent empire to the big screen.

You may be saying, “But wait Zach, didn’t he already have a documentary on the big screen?”

Yes you idiots, I know he did. Pedophile’s Dream “Never Say Never 3D” was a big hit. But this time around, he won’t be playing himself. So it’s a real big screen picture, not a straight to DVD wannabe.

He’s rumored to be joining in Ashton Kutcher’s new movie “What Would Kenny Do” where Kutcher plays a man who visits his teenage self (played by the Biebs) via Hologram to give him advice.

 

"Oh SHIT, is that what I'm gonna look like when my balls drop?!"

 

 

Meh, sounds like a typical Ashton movie. With a dash of Zac Efron in Seventeen Again. Maybe I spoke to soon about it not being a “straight to DVD wannabe…”

None the less, it will be a blockbuster. Everything Justin Bieber touches turns to gold.


A drunk (maybe) muggle.

Darren Criss performed Teenage Dream, among other things at Perez Hilton’s “Blue Ball” 33rd birthday celebration on Saturday night.

Rumors have been swirling that our favorite muggle who plays a homo on Glee was a little tipsy. And by a little tipsy, I mean drunk.

Exhibit gAy:

Exhibit B:

 

Whether or not he is drunk, one things is glaringly obvious:

He is so straight. I mean come on, being straight and singing songs from “The Little Mermaid” go together like being gay and quail hunting. Ya know?

 

Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,

Zach


The Gayest Two Days Ever.

Seriously though. The past two days have been so gay I hardly know what to do with myself short of carrying around a glitter cannon  to shoot at the muggles hetero’s of the world.

Yesterday was #BornThisDay because it was was Mother Monster’s birthday. Although the birthday celebration didn’t effect my life directly, Lady GaGa tweeted about having chicken and waffles in bed. And anyone who has chicken and waffles in bed is officially a black woman, and therefore DOES personally effect my life. Why? I don’t know. But I promise I’m not being racist.

Lady Gaga tweeted this pitcha via twitter. Redundant? Probably. Necessary? Definitely. She was at her birthday dinner.

I wish that table was my face.

Sometimes I hope I am never famous because then I’ll feel obligated to always eat in restaurants that are poorly lit. Does being famous mean you’re also a vampire? I don’t understand the correlation.

I still want to be famous. So bring on the blood and money. But not any blood money please. That’s a very important “and.”

Today is the day it’s Britney bitch Spears released her new album, Femme Fatale.

A little transexual. But I dig it.

In unrelated news, today Kevin Federline also dropped something. His girlfriend Victoria Prince (I don’t have a clue either) is pregnant. Someone tricked him into thinking that this news would detract from her album release.

BB, you’re always going to be her background dancer. It doesn’t matter if you’re literally on stage, or on the stage of LIFE. So please, stop reproducing.

Also, here is my proverbial glitter cannon. I’m about to fire it right in your face. Shield your muggles.

So you need to deal with this (again).

 

*Squeal*

He’s SO NOT straight.

 

Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,

Zach


Liberal Lesbian.

JAYKAY. She isn’t really. She’s just starring as one in her new movie. The movie is an indie flick called “Angels Crest.”

Kate Walsh is one of my favorite aggressive liberals out in the Land of Holly who isn’t afraid of a little twitter conflict.

 

"Bring it."

 

 

Back in January, Bristol fucking Palin was scheduled to give a speech at Washington University on abstinence.

Students quickly started protesting because, well, obviously.

Kate tweeted “Welcome to the Idiocracy!” when a student at Wash.U. asked Kate to join in the protest.

The speech was cancelled by the University. They said it was a mutual agreement. Right. The conversation probably went like this:

University: Everyone hates you, so you can’t come talk here. Also, you’ve got a child out of wedlock. You didn’t abstain. Remember?

Stoopid: Yeah but now I can tell people not to do it because sex isn’t that great.

University: Maybe its just Levi, because we think sex is pretty great.

Stoopid: Well maybe I should try again, cause seriously it wasn’t worth having this kid for.

University: Aren’t you glad you didn’t say that in front of 10,000 students who already thought you were a moron?

Click.

 

(There are few people who anger me more than Sarah Palin, but Bristol is one of them. She openly criticizes celebrities like Kim Kardashian for not having to work for their fame, and being bad role models. Um, excuse me you delusional bitch, you’re an insufferably ignorant “politician’s” daughter who did nothing but have sex with one of the stupidest men on planet earth to get your career going. Shut the FUCK up.)

Phew, back to my point. Palin’s really get under my skin.

This isn’t Kate’s first Lesbian role. She was a transgender suspect on CSI, and in 2003 she played Sandra Oh’s partner in “Under the Tuscan Sun.”

I love me some fearless actresses.

 

Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,

Zach


LiLo Love.

Lindsay Lohan may have dropped her surname, but she hasn’t dropped her legal issues. Not only does she have the Felony Grand Theft trial going on, but she also is still being investigated for Criminal Battery from back when she was in rehab!

Oi vey.

It’s okay! She is still looking faboosh outside of court right? Lindsay has the best accessories in the biz, and I’m obsessed.

Arriving at JFK 3-13-11

That bag is one of Lindsay’s favorites, but also one of mine. She wears it all the time. Also, I love her jacket. She is on trend with the military jacket, but still keeping her slouchy cali style.

 

This caption is just to draw your attention towards Lindsay's feet.

 

LOOK at those leopard print loafers! OhMyFashionGod I am so obsessed. This picture is so glam. The blackberry, the scarf, the oversized chunky knitted sweater. The ever present sunnies. I want to be her assistant. And twin.

 

Lindsay (Lohan?) for Kira Plastinina

 

Gorgeous.

 

Lindsay (Lohan?) for Kira Plastinina

 

Smolder honey, smolder.
I want that ring in my life.

Lindsay (Lohan?) for Kira Plastinina

I love this whole outfit. But the glove and the shoes are everything.
Watch your kooka kneeling down like that Linz.

 

Accessories are my favorite aspect of fashion, and maybe that is why I will always forgive Lindsay for her transgressions.

But two things are for sure:

1. The Fagazine will always be Pro Gay-Marriage.
2.The Fagazine will always be Pro Lindsanity.

 

Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,

Zach


This is Me.

Oh hey, this is me. Zach

This is me again!

This is my alter ego, Pharique.


Ninety percent of the time, when a camera is pointed at me, I become possessed.


Who would you rather be friends with?

 

Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,

Zach


I like it like it, Come on.

Remember this video by Rihanna?

S&M

Remember how I was/am obsessed with it?

 

Well, it turns out Rihanna isn’t the Only Girl in the World who has used those images. Thanks to Fagazine’s Technical Director Ryan Seminara, I have seen the light.  David Lachapelle is a renowned Fashion, Editorial, and Commercial Photographer who seems to have been plagiarized by Rihanna. Don’t be rude girl girl can you get it up

Thanks for the compilation Ryan.

Don’t get me wrong, I still adore the video. BUT, I think David Lachapelle was toterly justified in suing RiRi.
I would ask which imagery y’all prefer, but I mean. They’re pretty identical.

 

Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,

Zach


Vatican Assassin Warlock

So everyone has heard/seen the Charlie Sheen interviews from this past week right? He is stark raving mad! But the way he describes himself as having tiger blood and an adonis body? Comedic gold. Oh, and don’t forget he called himself a Vatican Assassin Warlock when asked about how he will proceed with suing Two and a Half Men.

 

By calling himself a warlock, Charlie pissed off a coven of warlocks in Salem, Mass. Yeah, seriously.

 

But if you haven’t followed him on twitter yet, I suggest you do so. His official reasoning for joining twitter is because he is unemployed. Celebrity sponsored tweets go for about 10k. (Something he should get used to..)

Follow Charlie Sheen, here.

 

Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,

Zach

 


Kim K. is my “Jam”

Guys. Remember when Lindsay had her music career and we hated it? (Except me, I to this day love the song Rumors.)

 

Then remember when Paris released her single and everyone laughed? And how Kim and Paris stopped talking when Kim asked a club in Vegas if they were ready to listen to some real music directly after Paris requested it herself? Ell Oh Ell.

 

Well, now Kim Kardashian has her own song. And it has been released. It’s called “Jam.”

Here it is.

(They embed code for that particular player wouldn’t work, my b.)

“[The-Dream and I] just had a good time, and the proceeds are going to a cancer organization [because we both] lost a parent to cancer. So it’s just fun,”

All proceeds from the track go to a cancer organization. That makes me feel better about it. Gay clubs are gonna be all over this one.

They playin’ my jam.

 

Editor-In-Chief of Fagazine,

Zach